Livin' La Vida Loca
by Lunatic
Summary: Jack has fallen into the hands of the Spanish Navy, who made a deal with him. Will Jack be able to twist this deal in such a way that it's going to be the most profit for him?
1. Prologue

_Disclaimer: I don't own… I just like to play with the characters_

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AN: Well… since I'm doing all these horrible things to Jack in my other stories I thought I was going to allow him to have some fun in this one :)

**Livin' La Vida Loca******

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**Prologue******

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On just an ordinary day in Tortuga in _the Faithful Bride,_ Jack was enjoying some much-deserved rum after a couple of weeks of pillaging and plundering.

"Well, luv. Give good ol' Jack another drink."

Captain Jack Sparrow winked to the barmaid and she giggled as if she's still a young and innocent girl. Which she obviously isn't. A large scar can be seen at the left side of her face, a constant reminder of a meeting she once had with a couple of dangerously drunken men. Soon she returned with a new mug filled with rum and she's being rewarded with a golden-white grin from the eccentric pirate captain.

"Aye! Rosalind! We want some ale over here!"

Rosalind pouted, but she knew she had to get back to her work. She couldn't risk to loose this, especially not since she has had far worse jobs. Though she always rather enjoys talking to this particular visitor since he could be a real charm and, when in the right mood, loved to order some drinks for her as well.

Happily Jack emptied yet another mug. Life was certainly good at the moment. He had made a large profit during his last trip, plundering a Spanish Galion and even managing to find some rather exclusive stuff along the way. Selling those had been a good idea as well and now his purse was filled with a couple of large golden coins, enough to continue drinking for at least a couple of hours more. And above all this he had just visited his friends, Will and Elizabeth Turner, something that always brought him in higher spirits. Yes, life was good!

"Hello mate. You are captain Jack Sparrow, innit?"

A man sat down next to Jack, leaning towards him while his long black hair fell in his face. The man had a bit of an odd accent and two surprisingly intelligent brown eyes.

"The one and only, mate," Jack flashed a grin.

"Aye. My name is Pedro Sanchez. Nice to meet you, mate." They shook hands. "I'm looking for a spot on a ship. Can I offer ye a drink?"

"Captain Jack Sparrow _never_ says no to a drink, mate."

Pedro smiled and placed the order. Soon after another girl than Rosalind brought the two drinks, leaving the two men alone. Pedro took a large sip from his beer and turned his attention back on Jack.

"If I understand well you are the Captain of _the Black Pearl_ right?"

Jack grinned proudly. "She's all mine mate. Just like it should." He took a sip from his rum and frowned. It tasted not right. They probably used some of the old rum bottles from behind the bar, those who were normally used for the mean and annoying customers. This other waitress was obviously new and hadn't had the pleasure of meeting him just yet. He had to remember to change that really soon.

"Aye… need anyone for your crew?"

Jack took another sip from his rum, but it still doesn't taste any better. In fact, it tasted even worse. Slowly the world started spinning in front of Jack's eyes, something that isn't supposed to happen yet. Worlds only start spinning if he had been drinking far more than he had so far, or somebody put something in the rum. Jack noticed how Pedro's intelligent eyes search for his and suddenly the puzzle becomes very clear.

"Yer poisoned the rum!" he managed to whisper in utter shock. He tried to stand on his feet, but the poison already takes over and darkness claimed him.

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_Yes, I know I said I'm going to allow Jack some fun in this one. Be patient ;)___

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	2. In which interesting things do happen

_Shame on me! I forgot to thank my beta, and Spanish help in the first chapter! So: a VERY big hug to my beta Vree_

**Chapter 1 - In which interesting things do happen******

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Captain Jack Sparrow woke up with a headache as if he had tried to drink every bit of alcohol in the entire Caribbean. Which, if his memory was correct, was not true. In fact, he had just started drinking when he remembered well. Then Pedro Sanchez had offered him a drink and things had turned ugly.

Slowly everything around him started to make more sense, as far as you could speak of 'sense' when talking about Captain Jack Sparrow. His hands and feet were chained, but he was lying as comfortable as possible under soft sheets in a bed. On a ship. The slow and rhythmic movements could tell him that much. But it wasn't his _Pearl._ His _Pearl_ always gave him a save feeling, this ship did no such thing. This ship was completely strange to Jack at all.

He opened his eyes and immediately after decided that that's a bad idea. The world still seemed to swim in front of his eyes and that was never a very good sign. Vaguely he heard some shouting from other people, but he couldn't recognize any familiar voice.

A couple of minutes after Jack has woken up he noticed a new sound. Footsteps. Footsteps coming down his way. Determined to pretend he's still unconscious Jack kept his eyes closed and tried to act as unconscious as possible. Soon he heard somebody enter the room and than two small hands touched his face. His head is lifted up a bit and a mug is brought to his mouth. Suddenly Jack noticed the dryness of his throat and gratefully he swallowed the substance in the mug… to immediately spit it out again.

"Blasted devil! What do ye think yer doing? Poisoning me?!" What Jack saw in front of him surprised him to say the least. A small boy is looking at him with big eyes of fear, the mug with water lying forgotten at his feet.

"Never give captain Jack Sparrow water, savvy?" Jack grinned, trying to calm down the small kid, but it seems no use. In a sudden rush of panic the young boy ran away blabbering some words that Jack slowly registered as Spanish.

Interesting.

He frowned while he's putting the little pieces of information together. Pedro Sanchez drugged him. He was now on an unknown ship and a young boy talked Spanish. That could only mean that he was on a Spanish ship as well. Immediately Jack felt better and rather impressed by his own thinking. This was nothing that he couldn't handle.

Footsteps came near again and this time more than one pair. Realizing it's no use anymore to pretend to be asleep again Jack shrugged. He was just going to wait what was going to happen next.

The first man who entered was Pedro Sanchez, who has got an almost apologizing grin on his face. The second man who entered was obviously the captain of this ship. At least, according to the hat and the rest of the clothing. Jack sighed. Not a pirate, he could tell that right now already. It looked like he was imprisoned on a ship from the Spanish Navy. Just great!

_Tu hablas espanol?_

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Jack grimaced. What do they think he is? An idiot? Of course he speaks Spanish, what kind of pirate do they think he is? But he has learned another important thing during his life as a pirate: as long as your enemy underestimated you, you had more chance to survive.

"Whadda ya say mate? I'm only a humble pirate," he flashed his grin again; curious about what's going to happen next.

The Captain rolled his eyes, than he turned his attention to Pedro and ordered him to take the pirate captain to his hut.

Interesting.

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Jack was enjoying himself immensely. He was sitting in a chair in front of a desk. Next to him sat Pedro and in front of him the Spanish Captain. The last hour has been spent with the Captain and Pedro talking to each other in Spanish, once in a while bringing their attention to Jack before turning back to their conversation again.

Until now things still looked good in Jack's humble opinion. Pedro had told his captain stories about Jack. Stories about how he sacked Nassau port without a single shot and escaped from under the eyes of the Royal Navy themselves. He also talked about Barbossa and _the Pearl_ and only one moment Jack had almost given himself away. Pedro had told his captain how Jack had been marooned on an island and saved by rumrunners.

This was, of course, not true. Captain Jack Sparrow did not escape in such a boring way if he could avoid it. The true story about his escape from the island was totally different. The truth was that he had escaped with a little bit of help from two breathtaking mermaids, who had fallen for his charms and good looks the moment they saw him. Of course.

But somehow he managed to stay quiet. Until now he had not given himself away and Pedro and the Captain thought he couldn't understand a word. Which was good. But boring as well.

After more than 30 minutes hearing his own adventures been told in a boring and not exciting way Jack attention span had been reduced to zero. First he had started to observe his surrounding, but had stopped soon after that. This was just jet again a captain's hut, like there were thousands of them on every ship of the Navy. Then Jack had started singing the song Elizabeth taught him, but after an annoyed look by the Spanish Captain he had stopped with that as well.

Right now he was entertaining himself with all sort of brilliant (or completely insane) ideas to escape. Of no use, of course, because what was he going to do after he had killed or captured the captain of this ship? Swim back to dry land? On the journey to the captain's cabin he had seen that they were sailing somewhere in the middle of the ocean with no land in sight. And he strangely doubted that those mermaids would help him again. But it was still fun to imagine the look on Will & Elizabeth Turner, and especially Anamaria, when he would come back standing on the back of a giant whale who brought him back home after his marvelous escape.

"Sparrow?"

"_Captain_ Jack Sparrow, sir," this immediately brought Jack back to reality. The Captain and Pedro were looking with interest at their prisoner in front of them, with such interest even that it made Jack feel rather uncomfortable.

"What's wrong mate? Is me hair out of place?"

The Captain rolled with his eyes and whispered something in Pedro's ear that Jack could not catch at the moment. Without a doubt something insulting, but such things never bothered Jack, unless it came out of the mouth of somebody he trusted.

"Captain Jack Sparrow, we want to make an accord with you."

Jack had already opened his mouth to say that he was impressed that the Spanish Captain could remember his name so quickly, since his British colleagues seemed to have a real issue with that, but the rest of the line caught him off guard. An accord? With him? But Jack wouldn't be Jack if he weren't able to gather himself together really quickly.

"Well mate, it would certainly help if ye would be so kind to help me out of these blasted things," he lifted up his still chained hands, "and I shall need to know yer name." He flashed his grin again, especially since this last comment reminded him of a meeting he had had a couple of years ago, with a - then still innocent - black smith.

Again the Captain and Pedro talked with each other and then Pedro stood up.

"Alright, Captain Sparrow. Mr. Sanchez here, shall take away your chains, but before he does I want you to realize one very important thing. _He_ is the one who has a weapon, not you. And trust me on my word that he is able to use it. Is that understood?" the Captain spoke with a heavy Spanish accent.

"Aye mate. Just get rid of these things!" Pedro freed Jack and while Jack happily is trying out if his hand movements are like they were before he sits down again, seemingly by accident touching the large and shining cutlass on his belt.

"Captain Sparrow, if you would be so kind to pay some attention now, please?" The Spanish Captain raised an eyebrow and exchanged a look with Pedro because of the rather odd behavior from Jack.

"I didn't quiet catch yer name yet, mate," Jack flashed his grin again, one hand going to the trinkets in his hair.

The Spanish Captain sighed. "I wasn't there yet, captain Sparrow. My name is Roberto Marquez, captain of the Spanish Navy. Right now you are captured on _my_ ship, _La estrella del mar__._ You've already met my first mate Pedro Sanchez."

First Jack bowed with his hand palms together to both of them, but then he brought his right hand to his face in a manner like he always does when he was thinking.

"Aye, Rob - ye don't mind if I call ye Rob, right?"

Roberto Marquez gave him a dark look.

"Alright mate, don't blow yer head off! Roberto -- _Captain_ Roberto, why this honor to invite me to yer ship?"

"Well, Captain Sparrow. I trust you on it that you are fully aware of the fact that you have, in your life as a pirate, cost us a large amount of money. I'm not even talking about the sums we had to pay to several of our merchants, because you stole our trade."

Jack grinned proudly. "It's always nice to be appreciated mate, but if ye don't mind… I would like to return to me ship." He stood already on his feet, rather unsteady but that's not the point, but is soon stopped by Pedro, who -acting rather nonchalant - points his cutlass to Jack's throat. Jack brought both his hands up to show that he recognized a treat when he saw one and sat down again. "Don't cut yerself mate," he muttered.

"I do mind, Captain Sparrow," continued Roberto as if nothing had happened. "Now we want you to do something for us in return."

This remark made Jack look up. "Do something fer ye? I'm afraid ye got the wrong person than, mate."

"I don't think so, _Captain._ Listen before you speak again. I want to make you an accord. You are going to sail my ship. You are going to be the captain of her," Jack opened his mouth to speak, but is stopped by a wave of Roberto's hand. "Of course you are still my prisoner, but my crew has got to listen to you. You are going to take down a couple of ships from the British Navy for us. When you are finished you are free to go again. In the mean time Mr. Sanchez is going to be your guard for this trip _and _your first mate. Now you can speak again, captain Sparrow."

Jack laughed. He couldn't help it, but this had to be the most ridiculous accord he had ever heard of. And that certainly said something.

"_You_ want _me_ to sail _your_ ship to take down some British ships for ye? What ever happened to the undefeated and strong Spanish Navy then, mate? Ye don't seriously think I would say yes to such a thing, right? This is the worst deal I've ever 'eard off… Ye will certainly never become a proper pirate!" he added as an afterthought.

"Well, Captain Sparrow. If you don't agree to this deal, then Mr. Sanchez over here is allowed to shoot you right on this very moment."

Suddenly Jack found himself with a pistol pointed at his heart and no way out.

"Alright mate… calm down. Yer a bit hasty don't ye think? What's in this fer me?"

"Your freedom. And your filthy life."

"Ah." Jack cocked his head, deep in thought. He had to admit that Roberto had him right on this moment. He doubted if he could kill, with no weapon at all, both the captain and his first mate and even if he could… it was not that he could actually take over an entire ship all by his onesies. On the other hand… sailing as a captain for the Spanish Navy was not really high on his 'things to do' list. He _never_ wanted to sail under the command of anyone.

"How many ships do ye want me to take down fer ye?"

"Well… 4 ships would be nice, Captain."

Slowly Jack nodded his head. "Why me, mate? Are you Spanish captains too scared for those Brits?"

Roberto slapped his hand on the desk in front of him. His eyes suddenly seem filled with fire and Jack understood immediately that he should not underestimate this man. "We are _never_ scared of those damned British! But you… _you_ are able to do things that most Spanish cannot. You are daft enough to do things that any other person with some sense would not do. You can help us to show who is the real master of these waters!"

"I see. So yer need a pirate to help yer…" Jack made clear with the tone of his voice how stupid he thought that was. "And what if the Brits make this ship sink? Or take us prisoner?"

A thin smile formed on Roberto's face. "Well, Captain Sparrow. Then this little adventure ends with us all being hanged on the gallows. I don't think you can marvelously escape from that again."

Roberto had a point. A scary good one. And slowly some other things came up in Jack's mind. If he played along in this game… he could end up being the better men. Jack had no doubt that he could trick these men. Heck, if he was lucky he could take over this entire ship! That would certainly add to the legendary Captain Jack Sparrow.

Jack grinned to both men in front of him. "Well, Roberto, we have an accord! Four ships of the British Navy and I'm off to chase my horizon again. Agreed."

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_Spanish translations:_

_Tu hablas espanol? - Do you speak Spanish?_

_La estrella del mar - The Star of the Sea_

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_Well, don't expect me to update this quick again: this chapter was already finished and beta'd, the next one still needs to be written and exam stress has finally caught up with me so I have no idea how long that will take…_

_JackFan2 - Well… I can't promise that Jack will have an easier time in this one… however, he will have more fun ;)_

_Pigwidgeon - LOL! Jack is a master in doing the stupid and the insane… be afraid ;)_


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